Oh yeah, Aunt Flo arrived today

This is the first since our HC in mid May. I guess I should be somewhat relieved, and I am on some level, because it means my hormones are stabilizing again and I am healthy. I have to say that I didn't know what to expect; I read many postings on my online support group, and they all varied widely. I could expect anything between "normal and not a problem" to "debilitating" . . . hmm. I was prepared for debilitating, but have been pleasantly surprised with normal and not a problem. Probably TMI for you.

I always expect the worst -- a TRUE pessimist -- and I am grateful when things don't go as I have (catastrophically) predicted. Funny . . . the only thing I didn't worry about was the fate of baby Michael -- why would I worry? I have two perfect children! -- but the universe dealt me a really bad hand. When I heard that diagnosis, I felt like I had been savagely beaten, pistol whipped, and left to find my way back out of the woods where I had been left for dead. How could I have not seen that coming? This one time I didn't worry . . . it came back to smack me in the face in a really big way.

My life is so different now. I have no more innocence. Horrible things happen. Many different, horrible things happen, and they can happen to me. They might happen again. My whole world -- my life's paradigm -- has shifted. Hence the name for this Blog. I do not see things -- the world -- the same way anymore. This is me, Version 2.0.